I catch myself doing it all the time. Getting upset about something that's over and done with. Reliving some past painful experience. Or even recreating past events, whether I was actually there or not, and creating a struggle for myself right now.
Sounds silly, and it is.
Because when I get present, I realize my life is pretty spectacular. Sure, there are things I'd like to improve... and I'm working on that.
Why do I do this? I'm not sure. Fear, I guess. Fear of the past coming back and happening again, perhaps. Trying to control my present by "keeping tabs on" what's happened in the past.
Regardless, it needs to stop. Or at least lessen significantly. There's no need for it. No good comes out of living in the past.
For me, and I suspect for many of you, there are certain things in the past that I don't like. I don't like that they happened. That's what draws my attention... the dislike for the past event and the desire to change it.
But we can't change the past. Choices people made. Things people did. It's done. Let it go.
When you continually think about past events, you're bringing them into your present... and using them to shape your future.
A far better, and wiser, course of action is to release the past. Just relax and release. Focus on what's here now, and set your intentions for the future.
Here's something else I've caught myself doing many times. When I meet someone new and they ask me what I do, my tendency is to start by saying, "Well, I used to be a teacher..."
Why do I do this?
I suspect because since I'm starting a new business, and being brand new in this field, I'm still unsure. I don't know if I'll succeed. I don't know what'll happen. And calling myself a "writer" or a "copywriter" feels foreign to me. (At least it used to... I'm getting better about it.)
I'm also not sure how people will respond to me saying, "I'm a writer." People tend to have preconceived notions about that. I don't want to be judged. And the profession of a teacher is so much more traditional and respected. At least in my family and with people I interact with most.
I'm learning though, that to get to where you want to go, you have to set your intentions there.
By continually living in the past, you're staying in the past. You're dooming yourself to either repeat the past or not get out of it.
Change your course! Change your thoughts.
Look around you right now, today. What beauty do you see? What love do you feel? That is the truth. The past is just your mind, your thoughts, your ego swirling around.
Release the past.
Set intentions for the future.
Focus on the present.