Saturday, January 12, 2013

Get to the Good

Every change has a scary period.  No matter how bad things were before, at least you knew what you had.  You had an idea what to expect.  So when you make a change (or a change occurs), even a change for the better, you can't be 100% sure you'll like it or actually be any happier.  It's a leap of faith.  Sometimes more so than others. 

The key is getting through that scary period in order to get to the good. 

Every experience IS for our greatest good.  Somehow, someway, sometime.  So the good is there, waiting for us.  We just have to get to it. 

In my recent personal experience, I had major doubts that I was doing the right thing by ending a two-year relationship.  I wanted to end the relationship prior to ending it.  But when it actually happened, I freaked out a little.  When I came home the first time after my boyfriend moved the majority of his stuff out (including our living room couch), I felt the bare-ness.  Not just in the house, but also what felt like in my life.  I felt a void.  Then the next day, after my boyfriend returned and got the rest of of his stuff, I cried.  A lot.  I was in mourning.  I was scared.  I didn't know if I was making the right decision. At times I downright felt like I was making a huge mistake. 

Fortunately, though, I let things continue to happen.  I started the ball rolling, so I just sat back and let it roll.  And you know what?  I got through the scary and to the good! 

First of all, I got a new couch (at a steal of a deal, if I might add) that I love.  So space-wise, my house no longer feels empty.  It doesn't feel like anything is missing anymore. 

But more than that, I feel like I'm back in touch with me.  I feel lighter.  More joyful.  Happy. 
Ahhh.... I made the right decision.  And it feels good

The next time you're in the middle of a change, I encourage you to let things unfold before you conclude if you made the right decision or not.  Give it a little time.  Let things sink in.  Then evaluate how you feel.  You can always make another change if you're not satisfied.  Follow your heart.  But in order to hear what your heart is telling you, you have to first let the dust settle and listen. 

Don't make rash judgments based on the fear you may likely be feeling in the midst of a big change.  Don't do what I almost did and think you made a mistake, when you really didn't.  It's just the fear talking.  The insecurity.  Even if you did make a mistake, it's still done.  Backpedaling won't undo what's done.  You can't unring a bell.  So let it ring.  And when it stops ringing, how do you feel then?  If you still feel like you made a mistake, then you can make amends to fixing it.  But I'm willing to say that if you listened to your spirit and followed your heart in the first place, you didn't make a mistake at all. 

So assume you didn't make a mistake.  You did what needed to be done (or what needed to be done, was done, regardless of whether you actually did it or not).  Know and accept that fear will quite possible be the paramount emotion at first.  The fear could last hours or days.  Let it be there.  Be kind and patient with yourself.  Do nice things for yourself.  Trust that the fear will subside and the good will rise to the top again. 

Be you, do what you need to do, get through the fear, and get to the good!  It's there, waiting for you!

*I love to read your thoughts and comments (below the quotes).*          

Quotes of the Day:

“Bran thought about it. 'Can a man still be brave if he's afraid?'
'That is the only time a man can be brave,' his father told him.”
  (George R.R. Martin, A Game of Thrones

“Don't give in to your fears. If you do, you won't be able to talk to your heart.”    (Paulo Coelho, The Alchemist)

"We gain strength, and courage, and confidence by each experience in which we really stop to look fear in the face... we must do that which we think we cannot." (Eleanor Roosevelt)

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